“I find it difficult to spend time outside my house, so I don’t have very many friends.”

Looking back, the first signs of my OCD began to manifest when I was 13 or 14. I became very rigid with organising my personal belongings and having my room ‘just right.’ I also started compulsively washing my hands and showering 4-5 times per day because my skin didn’t feel clean enough.

I had my son eight years ago (I’m 33 now), and definitely since then my OCD has changed. I have a lot of intrusive thoughts now. A lot of these are focused on the safety of my family and our home. I repeatedly check windows and doors to make sure they’re locked, especially at night. I also get very anxious about my husband when he is away at work. On a typical day I probably call or text him 2-3 times an hour just to make sure he’s ok. I would say the repeated checking of doors and windows, and the incessant phone calls / texts are the most noticeable symptoms for me.

Things got so bad a few years ago that I made an appointment to see my GP, who later referred me to a psychiatrist. After two psychiatric appointments, I was given a formal diagnosis of OCD with Generalised Anxiety Disorder. I was also prescribed an antidepressant to help with the symptoms and have since introduced a mild antipsychotic to my medication, and am currently attending psychotherapy sessions every two weeks.

Since my formal diagnosis, I’ve met with three different psychiatrists and only one appeared to have an above baseline knowledge of how OCD operates. My psychotherapist is lovely. She’s very patient and understanding but I do feel that she doesn’t have the correct skill set to treat my symptoms. I’ve been attending appointments with her for eight months now, and so far all I’ve learned are breathing techniques to help calm my anxiety.

At the minute, I don’t have access to specialised treatment as therapy like this is incredibly expensive. If it wasn’t for the support of people in online groups, I don’t know what I’d do. I’ve found a number of podcasts and online communities to be very useful, particularly in regards to feeling less alone and less like I’m the only one experiencing this.

My OCD has definitely affected my relationships. I find it difficult to spend time outside my house, so I don’t have very many friends. My family are very supportive, but I do feel like a burden 90% of the time.

During really bad episodes, the intrusive thoughts take on a very distressing sexual dimension, so I do find it difficult at these times to be close or intimate with my husband. He’s very understanding and supportive, but I do feel like I’m not enough as a person sometimes.

To date, my OCD hasn’t massively impacted my education. I’m a PhD student, currently, and while there have been times where I’ve struggled with intrusive thoughts and compulsions, having something to focus on has been super helpful.

As regards coping strategies, I’ve found journaling and keeping a daily log of my symptoms to be great as a reminder to myself that amid all the bad days, there are good days too. Through journaling and logging, I’ve also recognised that certain foods (particularly sugar-based ones) tend to spike symptoms and trigger mini-episodes, so by eliminating those I’ve found loads of relief.

OCD is definitely not always understood as a serious mental disorder. I think the circulation of memes on social media, and a general consensus that everyone is ‘a little bit OCD’ contributes directly to this. I do think, on the flip side, that many social media accounts are actively working to overturn this.