I have always had a sort of ambivalent relationship to my body. I haven’t always taken very good care of it, and at times it has shown. Hangovers that have lasted too many days. Scars, cuts and bruises- both accidental and intentional- have taken their place alongside tattoos. As I have hit my late thirties,…
I have Borderline Personality Disorder with depression and anxiety. My symptoms include fear of abandonment, lack of sense of self, a disturbed pattern of thinking, impulsive behaviour and chronic feelings of emptiness. In total there are nine symptoms of BPD and I’m lucky to no longer have turbulent relationships, explosive anger or self destructive tendencies….
I am a late teenager but I remember that ever since I was around eight to nine years old, I would be unable to feel any empathy for my caregivers when they would cry in front of me, and I noticed that I struggled to feel any empathy for classmates, a feeling that has persisted…
I have ‘quiet BPD’, which basically means that most (but not all) of my BPD characteristics are directed inwards instead of externally. My condition makes it extremely difficult for me to keep friendships and relationships consistently and healthily. My BPD also causes me to unhealthily fixate on people that I like which usually ends in…
I have suffered with BPD since I was a teenager (around 14/15 years old) but wasn’t officially diagnosed till I was 19. I have what is classified as ‘quiet’ BPD, which basically means I act out a lot of my symptoms internally rather than externally. For example, others may punch a wall or shout and…
For anyone who is unfamiliar with Borderline Personality Disorder, the idea of ‘splitting’ is quite a difficult concept to explain. After all, why would someone deliberately cut off friends, family and partners when they fear abandonment and rejection above all else? It doesn’t make much sense to people with BPD either, but here I am…
The first time I was sectioned I was taken off the railway lines by police and detained on a Section 136- a power to detain you and take you to a place of safety if they suspect you are suffering a mental illness and require immediate help. For me this meant I was taken by…
Woke up feeling excited, it’s too early to be awake but I’m positive it’s going to be a great day. I take my meds- an antidepressant and an antipsychotic, I love my meds, they make my days slightly easier, so I take them happily. I leave the house for work. I live in New York…
I feel like my BPD symptoms started showing when I was between the ages of 12 and 14 and continued to get worse over time. I would become completely obsessed with people and trying to be the best version of myself for them. I got my first favourite person when I was about 12 and…
My diagnoses are Bipolar Type 1 with psychotic features and Borderline Personality Disorder, so I have drawn-out periods of mania and depression, and when those end I still have problems with identity, emotional stability, anger, and suicidality. I first noticed something was wrong when I was in high school and would switch between phases of…