I think I have known, since childhood or adolescence, that something wasn’t right. I often saw things as moral imperatives (black and white thinking, basically) and would have very large emotional reactions because of the pain it caused when others didn’t follow them. Of the nine criteria for Borderline Personality Disorder, I struggle with eight…
I always felt ‘off’ when I was younger, like I couldn’t seem to ever truly fit in anywhere. Even when I was with groups of close friends, I felt like I didn’t belong. In terms of symptoms, BPD is all about emotional dysregulation and rapid/frequent mood swings. Throughout the day I can feel normal…
Thinking about my Borderline Personality Disorder and Schizotypal Personality Disorder, I first noticed symptoms when I was 14 when I first got the BPD ‘favourite person’. It wasn’t too bad the first time it happened, but my mental state did worsen afterwards, including developing hallucinations. As far back as I can remember I’ve had symptoms,…
I wake up most mornings not knowing what mood I’m going to be in or how many times my moods will switch that day, although most days I will suffer with negative thoughts flying at me all day long; a long dull ache of nothingness, finding it hard to find joy in things or looking forward…
I was diagnosed with Borderline Personality Disorder/ Emotionally Unstable Personality Disorder a couple of months ago but the diagnosis was suspected by professionals for longer, and by me, for even longer than that. Day to day I experience symptoms that impact my life, from not being able to communicate my thoughts and feelings to friends,…
I have a myriad of conditions- all diagnosed in adulthood- however I have been experiencing symptoms of most of these things since early childhood, with some popping up in my teen years. I have Bipolar Disorder (started as a teen/young adult), OCD (started in early childhood), ADHD (born with), autism (born with), Complex PTSD (I’ve…
I first noticed my emotions felt ‘bigger’ and increasingly less bearable for me when I was 18, after I struggled to gain the grades I had expected of myself in my final year of school. I had always been an emotional person, but considered it an asset, a sensitivity that meant I felt deep empathy…
I was ‘odd’ my whole childhood, but what I now know to be BPD symptoms became more pronounced after the death of my mom at eight years old. I found it was very hard to work with other people. I usually tended to work solo. I was hyper-verbal so I did well, and felt that…
My path to a BPD diagnosis began four years ago. I fell in love with a guy, but he didn’t love me back. He instead started dating my best friend. Then they broke up and he stopped talking to me and I totally fell apart. I started crying every day and I started hurting myself….
I have intense, overpowering emotions which are difficult to control. I keep thinking people are being horrible to me, whether it’s true or not. I don’t really have a sense of identity, but I do think I’m evil and worthless. I want love and attention, but I don’t know what it’s like to feel loved…